They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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