She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
And then he peed in my hair
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