come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
