how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
