Ketchup is God's man juice
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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