I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
