Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
