This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
