Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
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