i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize