I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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