He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
