If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
