I could have mohawked her pubes.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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