the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Randomize
