Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
