Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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