Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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