how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
