i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
