her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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