Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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