he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
