another moral hangover. fuck.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
