sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
