so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
