I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize