to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
