Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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