his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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