You were right. It hurts to walk today.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
