im drinking this country out of the recession.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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