I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
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Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
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Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly