4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
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