i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
