Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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