So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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