just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
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