There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
