Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
