I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
