well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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