Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize