Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
