lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
actually, I'm a sock model
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
