rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
