Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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