He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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