Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.