you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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