Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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