So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
