so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
The struggles of a small town man whore
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
